Monday, March 7, 2011

Gravy and Chili and Not-So-Hot Yoga

Have you ever eaten at Old Country Buffet? It's like every Chinese Buffet in the world, but with even worse food. Like MCL, but with an average age north of 93. About the same number of wheel chairs, though.

Old Country Buffet is the world's third largest consumer of butter. Not the whole chain. The one I went to. Outside the door there's a mat to wipe the cholesterol from your shoes on your way out.

I was there against my will this weekend. I tried to be good. Half of my plate was salad and veggies. But the mashed potatoes and "steak" frightened the salad right off the plate. Then a fried-something picked up the green beans and threw them into the jello. When I returned from fetching a drink, my pile of mashed potatoes had doubled in size. I'm pretty sure the "steak" went back for reinforcements. And I didn't remember getting any gravy.

They serve something that looks like a "roll" but it might as well be called a spoon because it's essentially a gravy delivery system.

It's been two days since I shoveled that mess into my mouth, and I still feel as if I'd had a transfusion of gristle and lard.

But that's not why you're here...

I did not run yesterday or today. Both planned days off. What was planned for today, however, I bagged.

Monday's are yoga days.

As I type this, I an supposed to be at Yoga for Runners, an especially sadistic hot yoga class designed to make runners hate yoga.

I was there last week, my first hot yoga experience. Just about puked. Not kidding.

When they say "hot" yoga, they are not fudging around. I was sweating like a glass of ice tea in a steam bath.

Oh, and do NOT eat a bowl of chili before hot yoga. It took every bit of my zen reserves, and all the strength of my pyloric sphincter, to keep that chili off of my mat. And the floor. And my neighbor's mat. And my neighbor.

So why aren't you there, you big wuss. Afraid you'd launch your lunch?

Excuse me... Do you have to use that tone? It's rude, you know...

I woke up today feeling like I'd had cement pumped into my hips. I spent all day today stretching. Ok, not all day. I had to work. I set an alarm to remind me to get up and stretch every hour.

Despite all of that stretching, the hips and lower back still a might tight. No idea why they are so bad today, but having forced the yogic issue before, I decided to stretch on my own, easily, at home, without the climate of Hades.

Go ahead, call me a loser.

LOSER!

Seriously!? Why are you even here?

I'm waiting for a webinar to start.

I'm going to yo' my own 'ga this evening, smooth and easy, gentle and sane. With an ice pack back.

Tomorrow, we ride! Wait... I meant run... we run!

Good running,
Doug

Images from here and here.